quarterly update :)

no, i didn't die... physically *haha* i may have died in small pieces in various places among various times between last post and now, but i am in fact still alive *praise be to the Lord of all for that* the only way i can make up for this lengthy sabbatical of mine is to flood you with my brain's overflow while i chomp my way through an extra dark hershey's with pomegranate pieces--> oh yeah, this is so much better than reading through personality disorders :))

story time: i was slow-poking along the road one day in traffic. my eyes tend to wander when i drive... something about observant first child syndrome... anyway, they were drawn to a nearby pasture that was dissected by the gaudy power line skyscrapers. (know what i am talking about) i was stuck at a horrible angle... at least for a person with oh-cee-dee tendencies... the lines that defined the supporting structure were similar enough to show symmetry, but they competed against each other in the most annoying way. i really tried not to focus on them... to no avail... my eyes were set on this wreck ruining nature. they clashed and clanged with the skyline. i continued to inch along the road with my eyes flashing between the power lines and the brake lights in front of me. eventually, i got to the point that all lines disappeared behind what could have been a 2-d backdrop. my mind was set at ease... the shapes lined up and contained perfection :) i stared at it, amazed that what had been irking my nerves for 5-10 minutes now pleased my soul. it didn't last long- traffic picked up and i drove away... i watched the perfect lines intersect with opposing reason in my rear view, yet i was not overcome with the same uneasiness that greeted me with my first scan of the horizon that evening. from one view, it stood perfect... in complete harmony. i thought about it a couple days ago as i fell asleep-- i was stuck in the imperfect phase for so long when in reality there were four perfect images co-existing. maybe it doesn't make you think as much as it made me think these past three weeks or so, but i have done a lot of thinking... and this is my conclusion~

how many times do we catch each other during imperfect phases? have you ever seen someone in their perfect phase? what does that look like... when we display our perfect phases are we simply hiding our multiple imperfect sides? how awesome that God sees all of our phases but chooses to cherish our perfect phase :)

random question: when samuel heard God call his name, do you think His voice sounded like eli's? if so, why? if not, why did samuel think it was eli?

from the home front: my dog has become a supreme shedding factory... her hair is everywhere - she leaves a plume everywhere she goes. it is frustrating to say the least, especially when wearing black dress pants :) i was mad at her the other day for it *because it is obviously her fault... or i am taxed beyond my own limits... go with the latter* i found four white coarse hair sticking out of my computer last week. knowing she had not been on my computer, i realized something-- because i choose to pet her and lover her, her hairs love me and pet everything i touch. if the same were true of me and the light and salt of the earth that i am to be- if i "soiled" everything i touched with the light of Christ and the salt of His words, those who were brushed with Truth would have no choice but to continue to spread it, directly or indirectly. oh the lessons from "marbelle," as my mother calls her...

lessons from the last semester: i am currently 16 school days and 3 exam days away from clinical rotations... NO MORE CLASS!!! this is one of the lessons i have learned these past 85 months. when you continually fight to be strong, you run out of steam regardless of your fit-ness. that being said, however, you somehow always have the strength *or friends with superior strength* to pick yourself back up and tackle another tidal wave... because life is just another day at the beach, right?!?!

concluding word and song(s): as i strive to gain my place in this world, i can't really overcome the general principle that i am nothing. day by day, it never gets old... i hope it never does...